Crime prevention series

Prevention

Published in:
Missing children : advice, information and preventative action for parents, teachers and counsellors
Paul Wyles
Canberra : Australian Institute of Criminology, 1988
ISBN 0 642 13556 8 ; ISSN 1031-5330
(Crime prevention series) ; pp. 4-22

There is no doubt that having a child go missing under whatever circumstances has an immediate and distressing effect on parents. In a general sense the best defence against your child going missing from home is to ensure a happy, loving and stable family environment. If at all possible, constantly emphasise to your child that you love hi her very much. It is important that, in the event of a disappearance from home, the child knows a welcome awaits him on his return.

This section on prevention deals with the steps parents can take to minimise the likelihood of children running away or being abducted and, in the event of a child's disappearance, optimising the chances of an early trace.

Identification

From the earliest possible age children should know:

• their full name
• their parents' full names
• their full address and telephone number their parents' work telephone number(s)

If the numbers cannot be memorised, write them on a card that can be carried by the child.

Put your child's name on the inside of his/her garments where appropriate. Do not put the child's name on the outside of clothes or books.

Your child's name and telephone number could be inscribed on the soles of his/her shoes with a heated knitting needle or a wood-burning kit. Such identification may prove useful in identifying amnesia cases.

It may be helpful for you to compile an identification file on your child which could include:

• a recent colour photograph (pre-schoolers should be photographed at least four times a year)
• name and address physical description
• a lock of hair
• telephone number
• school
• copy of birth certificate
• medication data and medical condition
• blood type
• previous illnesses
• immunisation record
• allergies
• speech impediments
• X-rays and dental records
• a footprint
• sample of handwriting
• tape recording of child's voice
• passport

Holding your child's passport is a good form of identification. An Australian non-custodial parent cannot take out a passport for a child and remove him/her overseas but non-Australian parents may be able to. Parents can no longer place their children on their own Australian passport. Each Australian child, if required to travel overseas, must have their own travel documents or passport.

Identikid - a program supported by Lions, Polaroid and Sydney radio 2UE - began operating at various shopping centres and schools in May 1985,

• The project supplies parents with a kit comprising a Polaroid photo-ID card of each child and a data card containing vital information.
• The cost of the kit is $2.00.
• Parents have details of each child's date of birth, height, weight, hair and eye colour, distinguishing marks and medication details recorded on special tamper-proof credit card-sized data cards. If parents agree, a child's fingerprints may also be recorded on the back of the card.
• More than 80,000 children have taken advantage of Identikid.
• Parents and teachers wishing to know more about the ldentikid program should contact: Lions Club National Office, PO Box 42, The Junction NSW 2291.

Telephone use

Children should know at the earliest possible age:

• how to use the telephone
• the difference between local and long distance calls
• the procedures for reversing calls and asking for operator assistance
• the emergency number for police (000 in all states and territories)
• if possible, their local police station number.

The telephone directory is a useful aid in an emergency and children should be taught to use one as soon as they are able.

Should your child be unavoidably left alone at home and the telephone rings, probably the best advice you can offer is for the child to answer the call but under no circumstances admit to being alone. The child should state his parent cannot come to the telephone just at the moment but will ring back when convenient. The child should then hang up, being sure not to engage the caller in conversation.

Your child should be taught to inform you of any telephone calls answered in your absence.

Awareness and supervision

A cardinal rule to be imparted to all children is NEVER HITCH-HIKE.

If your children bus to school, be sure there is adequate protection or supervision between bus-stop and school, and home and bus-stop. If not satisfied, the matter could well be taken up at your next school parents' meeting.

Children should not solicit door-to-door or undertake letter drops on their own. If they must engage in such activities they should at least be in groups. At the present time, door-to-door solicitations of sponsorships is widely encouraged by schools and it is not uncommon to see children pestering strangers in the streets and at shopping centres for sponsorships. This behaviour places children at risk and is extremely annoying to some citizens.

When in public places with your young children, at a shopping mail, cinema or park, arrange a meeting place in case you become separated - always provided, of course, your child is old enough to understand such instructions. Never knowingly separate from a young child in a public place, especially at shopping centres and amusement parks.

Ensure your children have at least 30c on them at all times so that if they are abducted or become lost they at least have enough money for a bus fare or telephone call should they have the opportunity.

Always know the home telephone numbers of your child's friends and, as new members enter the friendship group, obtain their telephone number as well.

Know where your child is going at all times and in whose company they are. This is an inflexible rule. Similarly, encourage your child to always be in the company of at least one friend.

Be aware to the best extent possible of your child's haunts and the routes he/she and his/her friends take in going to and from those haunts. If possible, travel those routes, including the way to school, noting the location of safe houses and other places of safety, such as police stations. It is recognised many parents just do not have the opportunity to observe this advice but, where opportunity does permit, it should be followed.

Co-operation always lightens the load. Watch your children as much as reasonably possible and do the same for your neighbours. Ask your neighbours to reciprocate.

Strangers, abduction and abuse

Strangers are people a child either does not know or does not know well.

Parents and teachers must impress upon children the dangers of talking to strangers.

Children should never:

• accept gifts from a stranger
• approach a stranger
• get in a stranger's car
• hitch-hike
• enter a stranger's house
• play in or near public toilets or vacant houses

Children should beware of strangers who ask for directions or claim to have the child's parents' permission to do certain things, such as give them a ride home.

If approached by a stranger a child should walk quickly away and report the incident to parents and teachers as soon as possible.

If followed by a stranger a child should:

• scream for help, and head for the safety of home or school.
• In some areas 'Safety House' schemes are in use where children are able to seek refuge in specially identified houses if they are scared or frightened.

If grabbed by a stranger a child should:

• create a disturbance
• shout: 'You're not my mummy/daddy, I don't want to go with you
• struggle and kick providing they don't place themselves in greater danger by doing so.

It is advisable for parents and teachers to role-play some situations involving strangers in order to illustrate to children the defensive/preventative actions detailed above.

An awareness of strangers, where they are likely to approach children, and what they are likely to say or do, should be fostered in children at an early age.

Stress to your child the importance of informing you if any adult asks him/her to keep a secret, this should include relatives.

Child abuse may occur whether or not a child is abducted. Both physical and sexual abuse can precipitate a child's running away Parents and teachers should be alert to changes of mood and behaviour in a child which may indicate abuse. Indicators may be disturbed sleep, loss of appetite and mood changes. Children should be taught there are certain parts of their body that are private, ie. the parts of the body covered by bathers. If someone does touch them on those parts or wants them to touch others, children should be taught to report that fact immediately to parent or teacher. Similarly, if improper oral contact is made with a child, that too should be reported. In this context it is useful if your child knows the correct names for all body parts.

Children should be encouraged to tell their parents if anyone touches them in a way that makes them feel embarrassed, uncomfortable or frightened.

Protective behaviours

'Protective Behaviours' refers to a system of personal safety training capable of addressing many of the problems that lead to children leaving home. The program is particularly effective in assisting children to develop their own capacities to analyse and resolve problems, including the sorts of problems which lead to their running away from home.

This account of 'Protective Behaviours' is based on a description provided by Sergeant Vicki Brown of the Community Policing Squad of Victoria Police. The program addresses all forms of abuse - physical as well as psychological - and is based on the assumption that children are capable - even in a hostile environment - of taking practical, physical and psychological steps to support themselves.

'Protective Behaviours' is based on two principles:

• we all have a right to feel safe all the time
• there's nothing so awful we cannot talk with someone about it.

The program possesses three core concepts:

Safety - in which a child is encouraged to identify situations in which it is acceptable to feel scared, such as riding a roller coaster or watching a spooky film.

Early warning signs - in which a child feels scared and trapped (as distinguished from the above) and the child's body alerts them to danger by going weak at the knees, shallow respiration, etc., all early warning signs to a child that all is not well with him/her. Signs vary from child to child and each must learn to recognise his/her own particular signs or combination of signs.

Networking - the ideas are encouraged that: victims can play a part in preventing their own abuse, and they can obtain the help they need. Thus, a child is encouraged to identify 'others' who can be of assistance when he/she feels genuinely unsafe. Those helpful I others' form a child's network.

Five strategies maximise the effective use of these three concepts:

Theme Reinforcement The two themes: 'We all have a right to feel safe all the time' and 'Nothing is so awful that we cannot talk about it with someone', are repeated throughout the program and afterwards are reinforced by use of posters. These two themes help to counter opposing messages directed toward a child.

Network Review After a child has identified a personal network of trusted adults that can be called upon when feeling unsafe, the network must be periodically reviewed. For example, some members may have moved on or died or, perhaps, a child may no longer feel safe with members of the network. The program itself may alert a child to the fact that someone, perhaps a trusted relative, is abusing hi her.

One Step Removed A tactic in which a person with a problem can approach another person for advice. However, rather than reveal one's own problem, the initiator presents the problem as belonging to a friend or acquaintance. If reception is positive, the initiator may reveal his/her role but, if reception is negative, no harm has been done and someone else can be approached for advice.

Persistence Expectations Children seeking advice from others cannot assume that a particular person will help them; they may or may not. One should be prepared to approach a number of persons before someone actually takes appropriate action.

Protective Interrupting Persons operating in support of protective behaviours should be prepared to interrupt others, including children, being too explicit in public or in groups about their problems. Such disclosure can lead to gossip which in turn can be further destructive of the person with the problem. In such instances, the one step removed approach should be encouraged.

Parents, teachers, refuge workers, welfare officers, police officers and others interested in learning more on the topic or wishing to participate in the program should contact Sergeant Vicki Brown on (03) 320 3635. 'Protective Behaviours' in New South Wales is run by a management committee and the police representative can be contacted through Community Relations at Police Headquarters on (02) 339 0277.

Baby-sitters

Baby-sitters should be screened carefully prior to employment and parents should ensure the sitter is old enough to behave responsibly.

If the sitter is an adult, ensure he/she is trustworthy.

Although it is fair to say females are less likely to abuse a child than a male, there is a growing awareness that some females are capable of unsavoury behaviour toward children.

Both males and females are capable of abducting children and it would be catastrophic to hire a baby-sitter who subsequently abducted your child or, alternatively, hire a baby-sitter who, due to lack of commonsense or whatever, permitted an intruder to abuse or abduct your child.

Although such events are relatively rare, parents are wise to assume they could be a victim rather than that they could not.

Above all, baby-sitters should not allow anyone other than a police officer into your dwelling.

If your child can use a telephone give him/her (as well as the babysitter) the phone number of your location. If a phone number is not available give your child the number of a trusted friend.

Always listen when your child tells you that he or she does not want to be with someone. There could be a reason!

Brief your baby-sitter. A baby-sitter must be provided with:

• your telephone number for the evening
• your local police station's telephone number
• a prepared list of pertinent telephone numbers (such a list should be standard in all dwellings)

In addition, baby-sitters should be briefed on how to deal with telephone calls while you are away from the house. In particular, he/she should never offer the information that he/she is the baby-sitter as such information implies your absence from the dwelling.

Your baby-sitter should never leave the house in your absence except in circumstances of emergency when it is expected that he/ she will take the children also.

To help exclude strangers from the house, have a peephole in all external doors. Locked screen doors may provide a limited alternative to a peephole. But, for apartment dwellers, a peephole is highly desirable.

Avoid leaving children at home on their own whenever possible. If a baby-sitter is unavailable, arrange for a relative or neighbour to look after the children in your absence. Indeed, to the best extent possible, try to prevent your child being alone at any time as they are most vulnerable to abductors and molesters at such times.

Absentee reporting

Truanting can be dangerous as children might place themselves in jeopardy whilst absent from school. Hanging around video arcades or similar behaviours makes them vulnerable to the attention of paedophiles. Such vulnerability can lead to abduction. Unfortunately, these days schools seem too busy to follow up most short-term absences. However, some schools do have the capacity to undertake absentee reporting should parents request such a service.

Absentee reporting can be conducted in a number of ways. The following guidelines represent an approach formulated in the United States by the Florida Department of Law Enforcement:

Teachers prepare lists of absences each morning and submit them to the school's principal.

If prior notice of absence has not been provided by a parent/ guardian, a nominated school employee immediately telephones the parent/guardian at a number previously provided.

If the parent/guardian, upon being informed of their child's absence, is unaware of any good reason for the absence, the school employee should advise the parent/guardian to remain calm and make sure someone stays at home by the telephone. The parent guardian could also be advised to check those places the child might frequent and, if the child is not quickly located, to report the absence to police.

Should the parent/guardian of an absent student not be contactable, the school principal, after checking the child's attendance record, then needs to decide whether to report the matter to police.

The phone call to the parents can be undertaken by either school employees, such as teachers, or volunteers.

Non-custodial (parental) abductions

Although the number of parental or non-custodial abductions throughout Australia is not large, some children are vulnerable to such a possibility.

If you feel your child falls within this category, it is a good idea to keep an identification file on your spouse or former spouse. The file should include:

• name
• nicknames
• address(es)
• telephone number(s)
• physical description
• colour photograph
• place of work
• known vehicle number(s) and description(s) account numbers
• citizenship status
• passport information
• military service
• organisational memberships
• details of separation and custody orders made by the Family Court.

Try to be alert to the possible effects on your former partner of changes in his/her life, your life and the child's life. Custodial intervention can be promoted by events such as a contemplated marriage, a new job, relocation, death or serious illness of a child, and pending Family Court actions.

If at all possible, be alert to changes in your former partner's behaviour, such as:

• change from little concern for a child to great concern
• sudden reappearance after an absence
• sudden friendliness after a period of conflict.

Of course, such apparent changes may not signal an intention to abduct but the possibility should be appreciated.

If you are separated, obtain legal custody as soon as possible. Without such an order both parents have equal rights to custody. Normally, police will not intervene in the event of your child being taken from one parent by the other unless you can produce a custody order.

Try to have included in your custody order a clause prohibiting the transfer of school records without the consent of both parents.

Also have included in your custody order a provision prohibiting your child leaving the country without your permission.

Be as precise and as reasonable as possible about visitation rights specified in any separation order or divorce decree. One common reason for custodial abductions is dissatisfaction with child access. With amicable agreement from the outset on times, days, weeks, months, holidays, illnesses, etc, the probability of an abduction may be reduced.

Always keep your valuable original papers, including divorce decrees, in a secure place, but keep copies of your custody order in case you need to produce it for police or other officials.

If divorce proceedings are in progress, you might consider requesting that your spouse not be permitted to leave the court's jurisdiction without consent.

If you expect abduction or harassment from your former partner, warn your baby-sitter, your child's school principal and any other relevant person.

Custodial parents with a real fear of abduction can contact the Australian Federal Police with a view to having their child's name placed on a computerised list designed to raise an alert should a named person present at passport control. Such a status lasts only three months, once approved, but can be extended. Non-custodial parents of another nationality can sometimes either place the child on their own passport or obtain a foreign passport for the child.

The 1980 Hague convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abductions (Parental Kidnapping) applies to children under the age of 16 years. It requires the return of a child to his/her original country, whether or not there was a custody order in existence at the time of an abduction. It applies to visitation rights as well as custody rights, although the return of a child to his/her original country might not be required to facilitate enforcement of visiting rights. Provisions of the Convention apply only when a child is taken from one ratifying country to another ratifying country, as reciprocal obligations are involved. Australia is a signatory to the Convention and has also ratified it. Other ratifying countries include Britain, Canada, France, Hungary, Luxembourg, Portugal, Spain and Switzerland. The United States is awaiting ratifying legislation to pass Congress.

As with all prevention-oriented advice, it is impossible for one to conform with every single precaution. You can but do your best, relating your security precautions to the degree of threat perceived.

Runaways - reasons or causes

It is always difficult to establish just why (or for which particular combination of reasons) a young person runs away from home. However, Christine Vincent, in Teenage Runaways: What Can a Parent Do? has identified six reasons. This booklet has been adopted by Victoria Police and copies are distributed to parents of missing children in that state by the Missing Persons Bureau.

The six reasons identified are:

There are some young people who have been influenced by peers and/or the media and think that home is too restrictive or dull. They mistakenly believe that by running away, life will be full of freedom and good times. These young people believe they are 'running to' freedom, adventure, new places, experiences and people. It is not that home is a bad place but the young person thinks there is a more exciting and rewarding world to meet.

Other young people may run away as a reaction to real events or imaginary or anticipated consequences. Many departures are impulsive. Some young people run away impulsively following an argument with parents (usually involving restrictions) or from fear of punishment by parents for some action. For example, a young girl may run away after an argument with a parent over her desire to attend a disco. In a short time, she may return once her anger 'cools'. Depending on the circumstances, it may be a form of retaliation toward the parents. Running away may also occur as a reaction to a teenage girl's discovery that she is pregnant, or as a reaction to the expectation of suspension from school.

Some young people run away for more serious reasons which usually involve longer periods of conflict with parents. Frequently the conflict results from:

• truancy and/or subject failure at school
• use of alcohol and/or drugs
• the teenager's association with friends who are law breakers
• too many restrictions by parents on clothes, hours or work at home (from the young person's point of view).

Children may run away from forms of abuse and neglect that have continued over long periods within the family. Young people who have experienced frequent fighting with a parent or parents, sometimes resulting in personal injury, may run away to prevent its re-occurrence. Similarly, children who are sexually abused by a parent or family member may run away. Some parents psychologically or emotionally abuse their child by being verbally abusive, making excessive demands, rejecting the child or behaving inconsistently. Such behaviour can lead a child to run away in order to preserve their mental health. Other parents neglect their child by failing to provide for his/her basic needs and proper levels of care.

Other young people have been asked to leave home or 'thrown out' by parents or guardians. This form of rejection usually eventuates after prolonged conflict or when parents have given up trying to help or control their teenager's behaviour. Some parents never really wanted their child and asking their teenager to leave home is seen as a solution from the parent's view. Some parents 'throw out' their teenager offspring and subsequently abandon them by moving residence.

Some young people are placed in custody or care of government or voluntary institutions as a result, usually, of a children's court case. They may be sent to a remand centre, institution, hostel or residential program to live permanently or for a period of time. If these young people run away from such institutions they are classed as missing persons.

If you are the parent of a runaway child you may be aware of some of the reasons underpinning his/her departure. Further insights might be gained from honest discussions once he/she returns home.

Runaways - signs of preparation

Far more children run away from home than are abducted and parents should be aware of signs of preparation prior to a child's departure. If signs are observed and acted upon many runaway cases could be prevented.

The US National Network of Runaway and Youth Services suggests a number of behavioural cues that might signal an intention to run away. These include:

• growing isolation - greater reticence than normal in a child
• excessive arguing - increased irritation erupting into rows
• abrupt mood swings - increased frequency and/or intensity of mood swings
• increased home discipline infractions - a greater number of rule infractions pertaining to the home and family life increased school violations - truancy, slipping grades, indiscipline
• increased sleeping - can be indicative of underlying problems and/or depression sufficient to result in running away reduced communication with family members generally
• parental arguments - personal, financial and marital problems resulting in parental conflict. Some children may alleviate their anxiety in the face of such circumstances by removing themselves from the scene.
• threats to run away - take them seriously and try to remove the causes of the child's dissatisfaction. Talk through the dissatisfaction but do not counter with threats of punishment as, if they do eventually run away, such threats might deter a return.
• family crisis - such as distressing death of parent or sibling
• sudden change in friends
• unexplained money or possessions and/or the making of mysterious phone calls - could indicate an intention to run away and/or involvement in dishonest or immoral practices.

Clearly some of these behavioural cues are no more than part of the 'normal' developmental process and some of these cues may become more noticeable in the early teen years.

Most children may manifest some of these signs at various time in their lives. But, just as the early signs of an illness should be acted upon, so should early signs of a child's dissatisfaction with his/her environment.

Commonsense has to be exercised by parents in interpreting such cues but, if convinced they are significant, assistance should be sought. Sources of assistance include school counsellors, family clergyman, family doctor and local government health/psychiatric services.

Runaways - prevention

Adolescent children in particular undergo stresses in coping with their social environments, especially their families.

Gerald Arenberg et al (1984) in Preventing Missing Children offer parents advice to improve communication with their offspring:

• pay attention - really listen to what your children say
• give them respect - support your child's struggle to grow and accept the maturity he/she has already achieved
• try to understand - consider things from your child's point of view
• avoid labels - identify the real problem in your household without resorting to meaningless labels
• don't hassle - show interest without probing; too many questions can cut off information
• don't use emotional blackmail - children resent being manipulated into conforming with the wishes of parents
• use team work - work together in identifying problems and their solutions
• don't always give answers - encourage your child to arrive at her own answer to some problems
• your children are responsible - offer your children options rather than orders but help them understand the consequences of their actions
• praise the positives - describe to your child his/her positive as well as negative behaviour and how such behaviour effects those around them; ensure you reinforce positive behaviour rather than negative behaviour
• talk about feelings - share your feelings with your child and vice versa; love in the home is perhaps the best method of preventing children running away.